A different perspective

My role shifted from buyer to vendor and suddenly it is a different point of view. 

People oggle. Sometimes they touch the stuff. They walk past my table then back track. Some would think hard holding the merchandize and flip them over on the other side and would even wear their glasses to get a magnified observation. 

They sneeze a lot too! 

The unforgiving heat under the tents makes everyone try to move some air with whatever kind of fan they can use. Cardboard, folded newspaper, towel, pechay leaves even. 

Django starts his drums as if to summon wind and shove heat.  It doesn't work. 

I  can now empathize with the pan de sals in the oven!

And elated that Japanese women love my work and are such lovely clients!! 

The Last Dive

A very enthusiastic  bird flew in the living room and banged into a closed window seconds after I opened the door.

Everything was still dazed from sleep including my house and was not ready to welcome the day as abruptly as this bird's life ended. 

I can imagine its energy going through the glass and taking a swoop before it jetted to the sky to finally disappear among the clouds never to return again. 

Calligraphy 101

I thought I knew.  My DIY calligraphy belonged to the wildlings.  Mine was like knowing how to get food into my mouth with spoon and fork  but not really knowing how to use the utensils properly. What goes on behind or underneath the art of a beautifully handwritten piece is a product of science and discipline.

There is a proper way to insert the nib into the holder.
There is a technique in dipping and keeping some ink in the "reservoir" that is a part of the nib.
In cleaning the nib, care must be taken not to dip the wooden part of the holder if the holder is made of wood of course.
Oh the discipline of dipping the nib, cleaning it, wiping with a cotton rag, closing the lid of the ink bottle, and repeat.

practice sheet  heavy hand.  Rx: practice. practice. practice

There is a certain angle that one must observe in calligraphy writing.  Compound curve does not apply to our body.  It is a basic line in calligraphy.  Rising stroke is a thin line so you lift the pen just a little bit.  Downward stroke is done with a little pressure or with more pr some pressure.  Timing is of great importance.  Pause then proceed.  Press then let go. Is this not also some basic lessons in life?

Keep your back straight, find the correct distance of your upper torso from the table to allow your arm to relax, pivot and whip!! "Relax, pivot and whip" are my wild words and not from my proper  pretty teacher.

There was a doctor in our class and she is definitely going to make prescription writing one top act with her calligraphy!

Since we were all into different careers and interests, we hope to improve our representation with beautiful handwriting!

Teacher Marie can be compared to a skilled swordsman. Her strokes are decisive, graceful and precise!  The ambiance in the House of Queens, pizza and the charmingly funny and lovely classmates today in Calligraphy 101 made me thank God all the more for Fridays.


( i have a long way to go... So much to learn. Practice, practice, practice)

Musings from Lucban

That there's a preferred road to every destination- in fact several roads you can choose from.

That there's a favorite time to travel- early morning is right for me except for one inconvenient truth. 

That people travel either alone or with company. Bad company or good company. I choose young and old. It is always nice to travel with a baby. Babies who are not my responsibility.  It is amusing and entertaining to travel with children. They are full of wisecracks and they keep the driver awake with their noise.  

Today i travelled with Ka Justo, the old stock and photographer, his mommy Ana, the soap maker and Vitty, the builder and pizza man. 

That I love the roadside, the little towns, churches, houses, sari-sari stores, remains of a fiesta, sleeping dogs, cows, carabaos, horses and goats on foot because the pigs and chickens travel by jeeps or small delivery trucks. ;(  the joyrney to my destination is very precious to me. 

That the market in every locality is the soul of that place. Markets are like people who wake and get up from their bed as they are. No masks and no pretenses. It is a hub for both sinners and saints. 

That I always end up buying baskets and bags made of native materials.  Quite plenty this time as i think of the girls in hedcen who probably don't look this way and fail to appreciate the hands of those who make things-that probably there's one or two unique souls who would choose these bags or baskets for their books and notebooks. :/  I got little baskets too for the little girls in school to play with. 

That I am not a foodie the way people are foodies. But i like to check if the town has sand-roasted peanuts with shell, or if they have in their local bakery the humble pan de coco -the bread baked to perfection and the filling moist with cane sugar and grated coconut. I just have one quirkiness when i see flies inside the "escaparate" or the display rack. That automatically disqualifies the panaderia or bakery.  Pan de coco in a 'sosyal' bakeshop rarely qualifies too. 

Oh and by the by, on your way to Lucban, make sure that you get the most delicious rice bibingka (cake) generously mixed with buko, topped with  cheese and prudently slapped with margarine. It is packed in a beautiful basket woven from green and fresh palm leaves.  

This last slice is free for grabs as i have had three- whole bibingkas! 

Invoking Good Fortune

 

How do you invoke good fortune?  Outside of working very hard and being positive - how else does one summon it? 

Marry someone old and rich? Why not someone handsome, young, wealthy and generous? Not old. Old can be grumpy and full of aching bones and decaying teeth!  

Entertain an indecent proposal? Like pimp your husband? Who would? The only prospect I had died of ovarian cancer and the other one, still alive, is broke! 

Do a scam! I tried it. Mind you, it was not bad at all and i am still scamming. Selling stuff after making them and I have such willing victims- willing to be part of the scam!! 

I have to scam some more according to my accountant. Excel says i need to work harder. 

I will be in Legazpi market this Sunday and hope to meet more people. 

So I wear my crystals like the rich and beautiful Chinese ladies invoking abundance and success! I added an elephant for more power. But if you look at my selfie, notice that I am holding it at the palm of my hand. 

Cheers! 

#helpbuildaclassroomforyolandachildren

 

Saraswati

Instead of being hunted, an image of a deer was haunting me in for the last few days. The lotus flowers came first. They were rising from a lake. 

But the dream that came, before it started to take form, were flowers. 

Very often, i allow myself to be led without understanding why but deeply feeling it. 

So i gathered my basket of acrylic tubes and some old brushes and reported to my  wall.  So lotus it was. Then the deer. 

This is the wall of the faculty room and  I thought of the symbolism of the lotus flowers. The funny part of my thought process was what if we are too lazy to rise above the mud but would bathe in it instead like a carabao? (Chuckle!) 

Still i wrote on the door: "to be beautiful like the lotus, one must be brave to rise above the mud."

Then the deer rose from its bath in the pond of lotus. Why the deer? I just painted.  Outside my mind, the image kept showing in the magazines, on my Etsy feed, in the tree branches and the goats on the road. 

It must mean something. Of course I was praying for a good and blessed school year otherwise, what else would i think about while i dedicate a small fracion of a few  days on a school wall? 

As I lay awake on bed at dawn today, I began to attribute to the deer, the lotus flowers and the water.  I know it symbolized something but was too lazy to be a sage. I chose to yahoo and turned out that i was not altogether surprised to read on the symbolism of the deer. 

And so i muse that perhaps what we have known in the past but was shelved in the recesses of our consciousness becomes a basis for intuition. Or maybe my guides led me. Or putting two together, maybe i am the spirit guide of me? 

It turns out that it was not just a painting after all. It was a prayer wall, an inspiration, a reminder and an avatar. 

My 20 minutes is over.   I hope that the HEDCen teachers will rise to be gods and goddesses of learning!  It was not just about the lotus rising above the mud- it is  more than that. 

Darn! I missed the bathing bird outside my window today!

Grateful

Grateful that there are all kinds of weather. Sunny, cloudy, rainy, windy. I taught these in kindergarten.

Grateful for all kinds of emotions. A few of them would be like:

 I love emoticons. They are the new Chinese characters. Very universal. Each one tells a story understood by many. 

Grateful for assortments. I do not particularly enjoy assorted chocolates in a box but that's the great thing! You will never know what to expect. Surprise!!!!

As life will always be. But i prefer peace and healthy and safe and lovely and prosperous and light and funny and all things God made beautiful for my family and loved ones. 

May they always be. 

As for myself- looking back at the things that were elusive in my life-  I asked my Father to make me a good person. Maybe it was something I did not deserve. 

Amen. 

The New Standard of Beauty

Women healers of soul, body and mind are always looking for alternative ways to promote a better way to live and love. 

May they always inspire others as they seek to be inspired and may they take care of this world that needs to be healed. 

May they inspire their men to discover their own gentle nature and to lead without war. 

May they raise their daughters and sons believing in the value of goodness. 

May their beauty shine through in everything they'd choose to embark on. 

May their tribe continue to exist. 

Amazing (G)race

This is a picture of a beautiful peaceful disarray.  Before this was like a fraternity ramble! (I meant rumble)

I can't believe how i survived the night. On my left were bony knees, and arms that felt like baseball bats and on my right felt line a ninja dart spinning ceaselessly all night. 

By midnight, a 'thick', round log would roll over the bony knees with a baseball bat for arms bumping me with a heavy thud!  The boy riding his horse would run over the spinning dart landing on my left side.  

Everything would be quiet and peaceful by dawn and that's about the only time I can forgive myself for being in the middle of a gang war! 

Not complaining. Just musing.  

Prudence and imagination

Today is chips day and saturday is sweet day. This is a simple house rule but hard to follow. Look where you go. Watch your steps. Slippers are left outside. Follow the rules. 

The first one is for the grandfather since he can be lavish and is prone to host a feast daily. I copied Marie's weekly menu. The funnygirls get their dose of sweets 

on Saturdays.

Justo bumps into corners because he looks the other way when walking. He is a hopeless "uzi". There was no need to tell others to watch their steps until Justo. 

A cockroach or two used to but when babies began to crawl on my floor, no other living thing survived when spotted. 

Everyone learned to leave the damned slippers outside including the fathers of these babies. 

Of course following the rules is a rule. It is a contract. It is a love agreement whether they all agree or not!

Nobody wants to be put back together with nylon or silk or gold stitches. Or mangled under a running vehicle dear God forbid!!!  So watch where you go. 

Not growing up without boundaries is dangerous. We can't wrap mouths with barb wires when they develop wrong appetite for food. Or any addiction in the future for that matter. 

The only thing that can grow wild and unlimited is imagination. Sadly there is no pill for it.  

Jacob asked me last night: "should we always be wearing pajamas even in summer?" That is because he had been wearing pajamas nightly ever since he can remember. This was no rule but because it was consistent, he thought it was. 

Rules become habits when consistent. The set of rules that are observed consistenly under a specific condition they were created become a habit and a way of life. 

Rules are meant to be purposeful and logical:

why leave your slippers by the door when the floor is dirtier than your slippers? 

if stores don't sell chips everyday then it wouldn't be a problem. It is in every mini mart that operates 24/7. Given that it's bad and also....good in a bad way. 

Oh and more from Ka Justo to Jacob when he woke up:  

don't panic

Walang reklamo ( no complaints)

No whining

just musing..

Stressing Stress

Back in the days, growing up did not include the word "stress" in my vocabulary. 

I was nervous. 

I was anxious.

I was afraid.

I was angry. 

I was busy. 

I was tired, exhausted. 

I was challenged. 

The level of how I felt was from bad, worse, worst or from very to very very, or anyhow a superlative degree could describe it. 

So that when i went through any of the identified mood or moment or status, i knew how to deal with it. Not through food nor pills. No weight gain. 

When angry, use reason. 

When nervous, practice, relax...

When exhausted, I rested...

I ate when hungry and never blamed overeating to my emotional, psychological or physical condition. If i gained weight, then i overate, i did not exercise restraint or I, simply  indulged. 

I exercised, prayed a lot, talked, talked, and talked alone or with a good friend. I cleaned the toilet, scrubbed the floor or cried till i could. Then i would face the
mirror and do my drama in front of a mirror.  See how this will change the emoment. ( emotional moment)

Nowadays, a simple cold is due to stress. Do you take stress tabs or do you take anti-histamine, take vitamin C or rest?  ( I swear by sinupret for colds)   Are you always in crowded places, staying up late at night, or sleeping with someone to blame? 

To be continued

Bacon anyone?

There are days when you feel this way.

Hahahaha!! Justo, the old stock told me this morning at breakfast: "bakit ang sungit mo?" (Why are you grumpy?)

The rambutan trees are blooming and I noticed a spurt in my agoho pine. They have grown taller than me! There is a crowding of plants in a corner and the roses have clusters of bloom. 

How can anyone be grumpy when you wake up to a great promise of day?

Bacon did it to me! So much bacon for little people!! Someone is killing them softly? 

Ziva says it all with her expression all my exclamation points and dismay. 

(She is wearing a lovely dress we found in the Sunday market.) 

Roses for Breakfast

Mind goes blank and it is a welcome rest.  There will be many thoughtful days ahead and so this morning i am listening unintentionally to what is outside of me- dogs barking, my computer trying to produce music but unsuccessfully, the kitchen sounds, garden sounds and more barking.

I stare at my breakfast while doing this. It is too beautiful to eat. 

And i make the first move of putting slices of orange on my plate and eating each slice uninterestingly. 

A bite of grape vintaged in my freezer. 

Consciously moving from empty to full. 

Some days you don't wake up with sunlight on your face and a life force that says 'Here I am!!'

Some days you make do with a little and not worry about it at all. 

Have some roses if the day started bleak. 

The Macopa Tree

There is a season for everything or everything has its season.

I gave the first fruits, plump and red in its natural arrangement, clinging tightly to a short bough, to the great grandmama or "Impo"of the Gutierrez family. 

It made her light up remembering her sweetheart's favorite fruit. The nurse strategically hung the branch of macopas  to where it could greet her till the fruits were dry and withered. Just like her, determinedly clinging to the last strand of life warmed only by the presence of her family's love and devotion.

The time to bear fruits come every season followed by when the fruits start to fall. 

But before that, birds of all colors and songs, bees and insects hold their feast on every branch that offer fruits and flowers before the cycle begins again. 

As for life well lived on earth, there is a season when this will have to come to an end to transition to beyond. 

We will miss, just like the birds do, that summer of joy with the macopas and the people we love because the rain will soon start to fall and a new chapter unfolds.

Morning Muse

Jacob called from the garden to tell me of the beautiful pink lotus bud. It captured his heart and mine. We shall await for its offering tomorrow morning when it unfurls its buttery petals.

Its irredescence makes it glow under the morning sun. 

It seems to ask the white lotus flower to wait for her to bloom. 

i guess she told the pink lotus bud that she might just have to "fall" tomorrow when the strong wind sweeps her crown up in the air then down the water to melt there. 

This was the conversation while the young dragonfly was admiring his shadow cast on the pad. 

Are Dreams for Keeping?

Today, i wanted to paint flowers around town, on decayed walls, on pavements, on bus stops, train stations, waiting areas, jeepneys, billboards or the sky perhaps. Anywhere people stare blankly or with lots in their minds. Just to shift focus from trouble to hope, from anger to peace, from numbness to life. 

Today i wanted to write my book "myLiFeaSApiTcHEr" and ask Gilda to do the forword. I wanted to find out how much or how little I can share with people whose purpose is to raise people better than themselves. 

This dawn while my eyes were still closed I thought of those and many more till this moment now as I seize what remains of the half asleep-half awake dreams. 

Who are you with in your dreams and when you wake up?  In my case, I found the gremlins beside me and the thick one was even snoring.