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| gentle and strong |
The adversity quotient is that kind of intelligence that makes men and women survive the most difficult challenges in life and is nipped by mothers, fathers and grandparents who are raising dough but not humen.
Children raised in a very limiting environment grow up with a very limited perspective and very low endurance threshold. Parents do not realize this, but they are crippling their sons with the wrong kind of love, when children should be falling, tripping, getting dirty, coming home hungry, smelly, running under the sun, getting soaked in the rain, being rejected in a soccer try-out, failing exams, committing mistakes...
Me: Do we think that being OA (over-acting) or dramatic will earn us the Famas Award or Oscars as the Best Mother in Comedy?
Boys can be taught to clean-up the mess they make, rise after a fall, try again when things do not go as planned and try better if he failed again. They should be taught to solve their problems, communicate, mend the tear in their shirt, sew buttons, plant a garden, raise a pet and be high in music, a job well done, a challenge well fought.
The father of my children was very patient especially when he was younger :D when our children needed to be brought to school, to soccer games and to soirees. He carried my daughter who was very sick then throughout their jeepney commute to the hospital and back, week after week. He went to market, he cooked and he ran a business.
He cried at my daughter's wedding, built her house, and loved all his grandchildren to a fault.
You: Maybe that is why he has forgotten all our wedding anniversaries!
All these did not make him less of a man.
My father and my brothers were/are men of great accomplishments not only in the careers or vocations they have chosen but even more in their diligence as fathers of their family. They developed their inner value that is beyond fame and money to that which transcends the ordinary image of a male or macho man.
These men that I have known have faults but they are alright. They do not abuse women nor do they escape from what is difficult in life. My sons and son-in-law have even exceeded the bar that the great men in the family have set. That makes me proud.
These men fell from stairs, from walls, broke their bones, got hungry, were bullied, were poor at one time of their lives, wore broken shoes, smelled flowers, carried their babies, were "men for others", were not always right but were always kind. They played in the mud, built something from scratch, handled maggot infested horse manure, bore the sweltering heat of the sun and got drenched in the rain. They stayed in their tasks as well.
Moral:
The reason why there are husbands who quit is because they never got wet in the rain.
You: That's a wild hypothesis.
Me: But why would some men, fathers, sons and brothers quit their jobs?
You: Blimey!
