Getting married or staying single?
To be in a relationship or out of it?
To keep wearing your rose-tinted sunglasses or to face your realities 20-20?
To just go with the flow or reinvent your life?
To married couples who have stayed together long enough to bear the tests of indifference, challenges of boredom, life transitions, bad habits, growing old including health concerns- it is painful to watch them so drawn apart and the only relationship present is a form of parasitism that involves sucking the life out of each other.
It takes the persistence of a good mountaineer to score the heights and dificulties of getting to the summit without breaking or turning back.
Sometimes a couple will decide to weather it together. But only the presence of grace and deep knowledge of self and acceptance of the other can build a fortress welded by love. This is difficult. Without kindness, they macerate each other.
Sometimes love and kindness are not enough. When the heart changes season and you are caught in any of its transition, even the promise that once sealed the deal becomes unrecognizale, null and void.
Sometimes we are not equipped to deal with a partner's inner workings. And if we are, it cannot be our burden. It is only the presence of desire and intention to will to be in the presence of each other's difficult bearings that one can last. And yes, the grace of God.
Romance in reality is good for 3 years with partners whose EQ is below average. Marriage either is not made to last. After some years, it would be good to start over. Otherwise, it just becomes a very unhealthy habit.
So maybe, like a car that needs to be re-aligned, whose mileage has gone beyond 5k miles, marriage should undergo the same recalculation.
Don't you think?
Happy anniversary to my children Ana and Lloyd, Vitty and Marie!!!
